You do have a point, when I said it’s necessary I meant from my situation where cis passing is extremely important due to risk of violence and my fear of violence, my dysphoria is a huge part but fear of being beaten for not passing is also very big. It’s happened before my picrew doesn’t have an eyepatch for style, I was attacked for being trans and it left me permanently blind in my left eye, and I wear an eyepatch to cover up my non-functional left eye. I know that the pressure to cis pass isn’t healthy and that in an ideal world it would only be about alleviating my dysphoria. It really sucks that I have to be afraid to speak in public because someone could clock me and get violent. I don’t mean to put people in difficult situations I was just scared and wanted to know in the moment if my voice sounded alright or if I was at risk of being clocked.

I know that VFS isn’t a magic bullet and I do know that training is still worthwhile, it has had an effect, it just isn’t enough on its own to make me sound not masculine. Which is why I’ve said I need it in order to be able to pass.

knowing the person is enough to change your perception of their voice

Maybe but honestly that’s not good enough, it’s paramount that I pass without being clocked, sounding fem to people I know and who like me is nice but it’s not enough. It won’t prevent me from ending up dead in an alley because some Neonazi heard me talking and instantly clocked me.

I don’t have the luxury of being openly trans and visibly queer, not without getting hurt, possibly killed.

At this point I’d take the risk, I can’t stand my voice so much that even if there was a risk of it making me mute I’d take it even for even a slim chance to just sound like a normal cis girl.

Congrats girl, you look stunning.

Hey there girl it’s alright, things will be okay. It’s natural not to like the idea at first but I’ll give you some advice. You’re trans whether you like it or not, things will go easier if you accept it sooner rather than later and start doing things to affirm your identity and make yourself comfortable, even little things.

I resisted for a very long time. I only transitioned on DIY hormones a few years ago, and before that there were many many signs but I ignored or resisted them like an idiot. I think I used to believe one could choose to be trans 🤦‍♀️. Obviously that didn’t work and I’m trans, as much as it’s brought me hardship and suffering. I am glad though that I did come out eventually and began the journey of transitioning, a lot of the stress, depression, and dysphoria has gotten better because of it. I hope someday I’ll be able to fully transition (voice surgery and bottom surgery) but at this point I’m not there yet, and probably won’t be for a while since surgeries are expensive.

It doesn’t make someone trans, but it is a strong sign they likely are trans…

Don’t worry sister, it gets easier eventually 🫂 🏳️‍⚧️

I’m not forcing anyone to be trans. I’m encouraging them to see their signs for what they are. The whole forcing people to be trans is TERF bullshit based on the idea that we’re transing the kids.

Have you ever considered being a lady in real life?

I like girls so much I became one in real life 🏳️‍⚧️

If you need a way to escape reality and you choose to be a girl, you might not be as male or hetero as you think, Just sayin…🥚 🏳️‍⚧️

I’ve never been able to get it the official way because the perverted doctor and therapist I was seeing really wanted to see “a man pretending to be a woman” and required I dress and act like a woman to get it. I wasn’t willing to humiliate myself for them (I still have dignity) so DIY for me.

I have tried, I’ve tried for years. My voice is just too deep for it to sound feminine no matter how I speak, and it’s not to say that I haven’t been trying. I won’t deny that I sound slightly more feminine than I did before but it still doesn’t pass. Some people tell me it does but I do know they’re only saying it to be nice, because anyone else will greet me as miss or ma’am when they see me but then change to sir when they hear me speak, even if I’m speaking fem.

You’d be better off simply buying extra on your own. I can’t share where I get mine but I’m sure you could find a supply for you to stockpile in case you need to DIY in the future.

I think I’m the sad one, I wish I passed better. I pass alright from what people say but my voice doesn’t. I’ve tried voice training but no matter what I still sound like a man (I asked outside opinions, people without seeing me said my voice sounded masculine). I wish I could get voice fem surgery so I could pass better, also bottom surgery since I hate those parts so much (not as much as I did before estrogen shriveled them up, but I still wish I didn’t have things sticking out down below).

Mine was very slow compared to other people, maybe it was because the DIY estrogen I had is weaker or maybe I could’ve gone with a higher dose. I’ve been on it for about 6 years and by now I for the most part completely pass except for my voice. It did take about twice as long as shown or more for me to show some of the changes. Thankfully for me hair loss isn’t common in my family so I’m lucky I never had to deal with that (my grandfather is in his 80s and still has a full head of hair, it’s completely white but it’s still lush and thick)

I guess that makes sense, still is incredible.

Not the OP, but I am transfem myself. No unfortunately beard doesn’t go away with hormones. It grows slightly more slowly and the hairs are finer, but it’s still there. I haven’t had laser or electrolysis to remove the hairs permanently so I still have to shave. I hate it so much, I wish my beard would just go away 😭

That’s incredible, all that from just 3 months of HRT. It’s really impressive. I wish I were that lucky, it took me more than 3 years to get much progress on HRT myself.

I’ve been trying for years, and while it does sound different than before I know it will probably never pass. Many people have said it does to be nice, and while I appreciate them trying to make me feel better, passing or not passing is a serious problem for me. I did use voice test apps, and sent samples of my “fem voice” to voice training communities without telling them my gender first and they said it sounded masculine. Plus I can’t do the different voice too long before I get tired but if I don’t even pass with it, what’s the point?