Assuming this dude is heterosexual, he’d be sandwiched between two big footed bitches in that bed. Solid!

Or the baby is suffocating underneath the sheets.

How do you place the erect Johnson on the balance to get an accurate weight? If you place the round side of the arch down, you’ll have false negatives and the pointy side down downwards the balance, you’ll get false positives proportional to the hardness of the Wilfred.

Chihuahuas are scary af. They could easily be on second or third.

This one made me feel sad for the recipient of this thrashing.

That Wii controller had just the right shape too.

The teacher is obviously a fat fuck that dreams of more pi.

This map exactly coincides with the area where people’s feet are fast as lightning. Uncanny!

The “I’ll tell wut” killed me 🤣🤣🤣

And your eyeballs are the exposed part of your brain.

Thumbs face up, not down.

Getting all five fingers in is a solid try. Would’ve gotten extra credit if the thumb was in the correct side.

I’m gonna need some buttons to make sure the pickpockets don’t steal my snickers bar.

We’ll need to include geography too.

Not sure about that detail but I’ve seen three dicks gathered around O’Ryans belt.

I have a rocket science degree and can confirm that this is accurate. And also, it’s no coincidence that large thick solid rockets are shaped like…you know.

And in a country with dogshit standards for HS science. And math. And reading. And history.

I think “barely” is a stretch. Babe didn’t even look at those PB and Jeggs.

Ok, ok! I’m in. What are we working with here, OP?

“If your mom is dank…”? Or is the mom obligated to take it?