part of what makes having that conversation so difficult is that I already have been presenting as nb to them and they assume I’m fine with that and I don’t want to have to come out to them again

Are there any safer options that dont have a risk of my parents knowing? Like I’ve mentioned in other replies in this thread I am sure they’d be accepting and I told them I was nb like a year ago to test the waters and they’ve been fine with that I just really am not ready for that conversation

I get that it’s probably a bad idea I just desperately need this and I’m not ready to have that talk with my parents

it’s just that I’m not ready to have that conversation with my parents yet but I need to medically transition as soon as possible. thank you for the resource

I’m kind of out to my parents they know that I go by a different name and I’ve only told them that I’m nonbinary. they seem to be supportive of my sister who’s lesbian as well. I don’t know if I can deal with being forced through more therapy to get hrt because my mental health has been in the gutter for the past 3 years and I would preferably not have to “prove” to a cis person that I have severe gender dysphoria

the issue with being in the US is with his things are right now I’m worried that the “good care” could get taken away very soon bc of the current politics situation. I don’t really know much about how the clinical stuff works besides if you dont get it through planned parenthood you have to be diagnosed and it’s a huge wait but I might be completely wrong

Personally I just skip the vps. I use my old HP laptop running fedora as my server (with cloudflared to expose my jellyfin and nextcloud because I live in a dorm and can’t port forward)

and that’s how I lost my medical license!

I use cloudflares tunneling service cloud flared which allowes me to have the service running on my home server and then cloudflare will automatically make the subdomains point towards the ip

I mean I don’t really have a choice because i don’t see a better way to put my home server on a url because I live in a dorm and can’t port forward or get a static ip

I really appreciate the advice I think I’m gonna just try buying some fem clothes tomorrow

Any idea how I could find some trans communities irl? I live in a city but I don’t know how to look for those types of groups and this is sort of the first time I’ve gone and actually not lurked and said something on a specifically trans community

What resources would you recommend specifically for figuring out how to get hrt? I am more willing to take the steps after learning how important it is but I still am unsure especially because as far as I know unless you do diy which is risky you have to go through the medical system which takes really long and also has diagnosis and also that migjt not be a great idea to me bc of current politics

Thank you for the info. I originally thought that the body changing stuff just ended once you become an adult kind of like puberty and knowing that is really helpful. For the mental stuff I already have the first 3 and some other issues but I really don’t want night terrors if that’s a common issue so I’ll try to do it soon. Also I have already read the dysphoria bible and I reread specific sections when I have imposter syndrome to reassure me but thank you anyway <3

What exactly are the consequences? Also like there’s still a lot of imposter syndrome because I havent done any social transitioning besides name and gender neutral pronouns which makes me really unsure if I want to do hrt

Im ngl I know for a fact my parents arent homophobic because my.sister is lesbian it’s just that I don’t want to deal with explaining to them that I’m on hrt and I feel like I would need bc they’re still paying for my insurance

Also that feeling of betraying yourself that you described is exactly how I felt too which kind of helps with imposter syndrome actually

Thank you so much I really appreciate the advice <3

thank you for the advice

I’m really unsure about the medical stuff right now bc of the politics situation even if I live in a blue state though and it feels like so much bigger of a hurdle too because it costs money and I am also not ready to like deal with my parents even though im out to them still